I Don't Want To Go Home
There are few things that I have noticed about my four year old and I'm just not ready for them yet. She has been expressing her feelings a lot and I am not sure how to respond. It all stared when we came home from a visit to our family out of town. All of a sudden, my daughter used phrases like, "I don't like our house, it's yucky" or "I don't want to go home, I hate our house". The first thing I wanted to do was agree with her 100%. I held back for obvious reasons.
The truth is that we are renting a house that has white walls with cracked and peeling paint. Our floors squeak when we walk on them and our kitchen cabinets are outdated and worn. Our kitchen floor is white and stays clean for only about five minutes after it has been mopped. The light fixtures are generic and our basement has the ugliest water heater I've ever seen in full view. It's ugly. Will she always remember how ugly the basement was and will it affect her later in life?
These thoughts have been swirling in my mind over and over again. Is a four year old supposed to notice these things? I think that I have to realize that she may be just four years old, but she has a very sensitive and perceptive soul. She must have heard me make those same remarks every so often. I thought my husband was the only one that could hear the conversation. Wrong. My four year old going on fourteen got an ear full of my rantings. My daughter has a very sensitive side to here, just like me. She is an extension of me and she feels what I feel.
I think this entire experience happened so I would finally add some flare to our home. We've lived three years and all of the things I need to add some personality to our home is right here already. We have so many beautiful watercolors that my father painted just siting in an over crowded closet. It is time to take off the bubble wrap and put them up on the wall and be seen. This will be a great project for my daughter and I to do together. We can make our home more of our home together. As her mommy, I need to set an example and make the best of what we have right now in our lives. Afterall, a house is only as good as the people in it. If my family is happy, I am even happier!
Esti will be adding some sweet smelling challah to her home in preparation for Rosh Hashana next week. This is an original post to NYC Moms Blog.







